Learn what dysregulation in your body looks like and what you can do about it.

The Nervous System.

 First of all, let’s talk about the nervous system. If you are a client of mine, you have probably heard me talk about this a lot. And it is important. The work we do in counseling is difficult, but if we do not tend to our nervous system first then that work becomes a whole lot harder.

Why?

Just like our heart beats to move blood and oxygen through our body, our autonomic nervous system is responsible for our well-being and maintaining balance within our bodies. Our sympathetic nervous system manages our fight or flight response to perceived danger and threat. Our parasympathetic nervous system or ventral vagal state brings us to a sense of safety and homeostasis. Our nervous system as a whole prompts us to respond in ways that are motivated by unconscious patterns and cause instinctive reactions.

So what does that mean?

On a very basic level, when your nervous system determines that there is danger around (this can be real or perceived) your body automatically shifts into a different gear and responds accordingly. So instead of stopping and thinking through your options or processing how you are feeling at the moment, those parts of your brain go offline so to speak, and your survival instincts take over.

What can happen though, whether due to underlying trauma, stress, or another factor, our system can become dysregulated. We begin to react to things that we normally would not respond to, maybe our reactions are disproportionate to what happened, or maybe we feel nothing at all. With dysregulation we may notice changes in our mood, behavior, thoughts, and physical sensations. We may feel panic out of nowhere, or suddenly find ourselves breathing heavy and our heart racing, or slipping into a state of numbness or brain fog. It can be difficult to maintain daily activities and responsibilities, things that were once easy have now become more challenging.

So learning more about your nervous system and dysregulation can be helpful for a few reasons:

• Better understanding of self. Learning the different autonomic nervous system states (and there are 3) can help us better understand our own emotions, reactions, and physical sensations. When you can identify what being in a survival state looks and feels like, you can then respond accordingly instead of maybe shaming yourself for having such a reaction.

• Decreasing feelings of shame. Often times we have reactions to things that may feel disproportionate to what has happened or catch us off guard. If we can look at the response through a nervous system lens we can be more objective instead of feeling shame or embarrassment over our reaction or emotional response.

• Know the difference. In a regulated nervous system we are able to move between different states and have appropriate responses to danger or threat. In a dysregulated nervous system we may feel stuck in a certain state (think fight/flight or shut down) or our system may have difficulty accurately assessing if someone or something is safe or not.

Once you have an understanding and awareness of your nervous system, you can then begin to find regulation within yourself more easily, show up for others more authentically, and find increased resiliency when life gets hard.

Next week we will explore an exercise to help familiarize you with the 3 states of the autonomic ladder and what dysregulation may look like in your body.

Until then, be kind and curious,

Hollis